Finding "ME" Time

Who would have thought that finding time in the day just to do the things I want to do, would be one of the hardest things for me to accomplish?

I have three children, a dog, a cat, laundry, dishes and pretty much a ton of responsibilities just like many of you. However, one of the hard parts for me is that every evening, It is like I am a single mom. My husband works night. Therefore there is no, wait until dad comes home and he can help. From 3pm-11pm it is me and chaos. So yeah, finding time for myself to "just relax" is a little tricky as you can imagine. But I find my ways!

After school is a great opportunity for everyone to have a snack, settle in and then go outside to play. This gives me an opportunity to film or write while they are exerting any extra energy not burned at school. Then I add filming in little tid bits along the day. This is actually super helpful because it can make my videos more interesting to watch. I have plans for more videos like this so stay tuned!

I think the most important thing we can do, no matter what is going on in our lives, is making sure to find some time throughout the day to do the things we find fun and relaxing. My dog probably benefits the most because everytime I just need a minute before my head explodes, I will announce "I need to take Trinity out, be right back!" and I can usually sneak five minutes of silence to screw off on my phone and play "Woody Puzzle" (I'm obsessed!)

When my kids go to their rooms for bed, notice how I didn't say sleep, thats a joke!, this is usually when I try to snag some tv time while I fold laundry. Although, I am working on just sitting and watching instead of multi-tasking (thank you Gina!) I need to learn that while multi-tasking can be great, sometimes you just need to veg out! Or as the younger generation is calling it "Cough rot" ...Is that right?

Who is worth changing for and who is worth keeping around?

When people defy your trust, it takes something out of you. It is almost like a physical feeling of loss. Trusting someone to do something they said they were going to do and then finding out they don’t, feels like the ultimate betrayal.

It hurts down to your very core.

 It makes a mark on your heart that will never quite go away. It changes your perspective of how humans operate and how what is important to that particular human that you gave that trust to. Trust is so important to us because it shows us who really cares about us and who doesn’t.

There are moments when everyone is untrustworthy or untruthful. It all depends on the situation and the people involved. Trust is so important because it gives us the answer of who we should invest in and who we shouldn’t. This isn’t to say that you should cancel this person or shut them out of your life completely, but what it does is build a boundary. It solidifies how much time and energy you will spend moving forward. It gives us insight to how this person thinks and makes decisions. People may mean well, but actions are the ultimate tell of how someone feels.

Learning to move forward regardless of being let down, is the ultimate mission of moving on and living happily. It’s simple, but not easy. Only you can decide how valuable people are in your life.

Time Blocking

When it comes to getting things done, I would say I have a hard time focusing for too long. I have never actually been diagnosed, but I wouldn't be shocked if I was told I have ADHD. I am a professional multi-tasker. I always have several things going on at once and I love to read three books at a time. People think I am crazy and well, I get it. I do not do things "normally" if there is such a thing. I like to have freedom and flexibility and go where my mood takes me. Hence why I embrace so much change all the time. While I am use to these ways, it does not mean that I get "more" done and it is not always efficient, but I do typically have fun. I'm not sure if fun is what other people in my life would call it, but thats okay!

With all that said, I am always trying to find a better way to get the things done that need to be done, daily. I have tried so many methods I am exhausted just thinking about it. The best part of all of these failed attempts are that I know the things that do not work for me and I know things that I like about keeping me on task. For example, timers are a saving grace for me. I know that if I really need to get shit done in a certain time, a timer will hold me accountable every time. I also know that I like check lists. My favorite app for this is GOOGLE KEEP (not sponsored).

I actually learned about this app from my friend Tim who once did a training on it at the private school we worked for at the time. I have never looked back. I keep so much information in this app. Back to the checklists. This app works like digital sticky notes all in once place. One of the features on these notes is a check box. My favorite thing about it is that after you check all of the boxes, you can press one button to uncheck them all and start again the next day, FRESH! I even use this for my grocery list since I tend to need most of the same items week to week and then I just add the difference on the end.

More recently I have decided to change up some of the check lists in this app to flow with a block scheduling. I have tried this method in the past but on paper. While I love pen to paper the most, it is not always the easiest to carry around but my phone is always with me. This works for me. When I wake up, I open the app and see what I need to do. I check off things as a I go and it helps me feel accomplished. My blocks are chopped up into 3 hour chunks. I find when I do larger chunks of time, it gives me time to have those interrupted moments where I get lost on my phone or someone took a knee to the pavement and need some love. I know that for me, I NEED wiggle room. If you make time blocks too short, it rarely leaves time for error and with three kids, we have errors!

I hope with me sharing my method and experiences, it can help you discover what does and doesn't work for you. Try out what you think might work and then tweak it as needed. The best part is that if something doesn't work like you thought, just change it. Don't dwell on it or make it a big deal or even change the whole method. Just tweak what needs to be tweaked. Maybe you need 3- 3hr blocks and one 5 hour block, then do that! There is no one waiting with a hot poker for you! Be flexible with yourself. Show yourself grace! And when something fails, laugh it off. I'm sure it is not that serious. Move on!